


All Our Fears of Yesterday

by i_write_a_lot



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Birthdays, Family, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Issues, Time - Freeform, Trauma, cheating death, lots of feels, mentions of Bucky Barnes - Freeform, past vs. present, reflective thoughts, team fic, team support
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-13
Updated: 2014-05-13
Packaged: 2018-01-24 15:35:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1610264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_write_a_lot/pseuds/i_write_a_lot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, the good o’Cap feels like he’s trapped in a winding spiral that’s leading towards his death. After all, he’s cheated death. Several times now. He feels as though he was supposed to have died years and years ago. But he didn’t. And now…now it’s like he’s just waiting for the inevitable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Our Fears of Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> -I do not own Captain America or the Avengers.
> 
> -Does anyone know when the Cap's birthday actually is? I'm not all that familiar with Captain America stuff yet, sorry.
> 
> -Also, I don't remember the Cap's girlfriends name. So I made that up too. Sorry. :(
> 
> -Kudos and Comments are much love!

Breakfast was being served/made in the kitchen at the Avenger’s Tower, and Steve felt rather drowsy as he was parking at the counter. He hadn’t slept well that night, despite the hilarity of the team’s movie night as they’d watched Warm Bodies, and those that were familiar with Zombies-Dr. Banner and Tony-were trying to explain the concept to the others, some of whom (Thor) just weren’t getting it. It had been rather amusing, but his mind felt like it had been elsewhere, except he wasn’t entirely sure of where it was, really. 

Natasha had seemed to notice, for she sat close next to him-she’d been next to him, and on her other side had been Clint, as it always seemed to be, these days. For if it wasn’t Clint dealing with issues like mind-control, past trauma, and whatnot…it was him for dealing with past trauma, technology freaking him out, or something else. The two of them seemed to be the most messed up on the team, but Tony sometimes gave them a run for their money, and so did Bruce…

Heck, they were all pretty much walking tramatized people, weren’t they?

“You in there, Sleeping Beauty? I asked how many pancakes you want,” Tony said loudly close to him, making him start. 

“What? Oh. I dunna, just make as many as you think-wait, scratch that, do NOT make a hundred pancakes like last time, Tony. I’m not doing an eating contest this early in the morning,” Steve said, serious as he watched Tony moving about the kitchen in apron and holding a spatula like it was a weapon to be feared.

With Tony, maybe it was though. 

Tony grinned.

“Aww, but Cap! See, Thor LOVES eating contests,” Tony said, beaming at him and looking hopeful. Steve wondered if Tony wanted to do another eating contest so he could get pictures to post on that website…book face or something. Steve still didn’t understand the internet, despite the hours that the team had been helping him to learn it. He liked Google, though. It was useful.

But back to the situation at hand, as Tony was still looking hopeful about the eating contest. Clint was grinning where he sat, watching them. 

“No, Tony.” Steve said, narrowing his eyes. He suddenly wasn’t in the mood for this, and something about that must’ve come across to Tony, for he frowned, and said in a much more serious tone, 

“Oh, alright, fine. I won’t do the eating contest today. How about three to start? And then we bring Natasha in here, and have a ‘family’ meeting, because I’m sure there’s something going on inside that thick head of yours.”

“Yeah, Cap. Even I heard it,” Clint chimed in, reaching for the coffee machine, and pouring himself a cup. The coffee machines these days were really interesting-Bucky would’ve loved this one, it did coffee and tea!

“I don’t know what’s wrong,” Steve admitted, frowning down at the counter. “Except…”

“What is it?” Natasha asked, coming in-Bruce was at her side, but Thor had yet to appear. Though that was likely because he was spending his morning with Jane in Mexico, having flown there last night, after the team’s movie. “Is there something wrong?” She asked, glancing around the kitchen.

“Something’s up with Steve,” Clint told her.

“Tattle-tale.” Steve muttered, but quickly added when Natasha narrowed her eyes at him, “I, uh…it’s nothing…serious. I don’t think. I’m not sure…” He paused, as his eyes settled onto the calendar that was on the refridgerator. He stared at it for a few long moments, feeling something funny in his chest. 

The month was August.

“What’s today’s date?” He asked, as they were all staring at him. Even Tony, who wasn’t paying attention to the pancake that was on the stove.

“The 22, why?” Tony answered promptly. 

August 22nd. 

Well. 

Now he knew why he’d been feeling funny. He stared at the calendar a bit, wondering how he could have possibly missed this. But then, before Bucky or Pam had always been there to help remind him of his birthday. 

“Cap?” Clint asked, looking concerned. 

“It’s…nothing. Not a big deal. Just…a memory of a day that I’d almost forgotten, that’s all.” He said, shaking his head. 

“You want to try that again?” Natasha asked, her voice soft and deadly as she crossed her arms over her chest. 

Steve actually snapped at her. 

“I said it’s nothing,” 

There was momentarily stunned silence. He never snapped at her, at any of them really, and so he knew he’d screwed up. But he didn’t care. 

He suddenly wasn’t hungry, and got off the stool, and said in a kind of calm voice,

“I’m going to the gym.”

Nobody tried to stop him.

\--

In the gym, he spent about thirty minutes at the punching bag, before a familiar voice said mildly, 

“You do know that the entire team makes daily updates to me every time I’m away?” 

Steve whirled, startled at seeing Dr. Banner there, looking a bit ragged from his trip to India. 

“Doc! I didn’t know you were back,” Steve said, surprised. 

“Just got back. And from what I saw in the kitchen, you’ve really upset the others.” Bruce commented, as he came up to the punching bag, and leaned against it. “Want to talk?”

“Not really,” Steve said, turning back to the bag, but not punching it. It wouldn’t do well to accidentally upset Big Green, as Tony sometimes called him.

“Consider it a Doctor’s Order. They said that something about today is really upsetting you,” Bruce said quietly, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“Why don’t you get contacts?” Steve blurted out, and winced. “Sorry-it’s just…Pepper was talking to some of us at dinner while you were gone, and someone brought you up, and someone else wondered about your glasses…”

“Perhaps I’m just a Harry Potter fan,” Bruce said wryly. Steve actually grinned at that, having just finished reading the Harry Potter books not to long ago. They had been excellent, really, and Bucky and Pam would’ve loved it…

He sighed as the two of them entered his head again, and Bruce frowned at him.

“I forgot that today was my birthday,” He told Bruce, after a few seconds of silence, while both were leaning against the punching bag.   
Bruce blinked, obviously taken by surprise. 

“Well,” He said, after a moment. “Happy Birthday?”

“I forgot that today was my birthday. Usually Bucky reminded me, when we were off doing battle or something, and he’d bring by a present or something. Or my girlfriend…or rather, my exgirlfriend…would remind me, bringing me a cupcake with a candle stuck in it. For some reason, she could make the best cupcakes ever, but she was horrible at making actual cake. Bucky would tease her endlessly about it.” Steve said, and Bruce nodded. 

“And no one reminded you today,” He said softly. 

Steve said nothing, feeling like the silence spoke to much anyway.

“Well,” Bruce said, after a few moments. “How about we go and let the group know that there’s going to be a party tonight?” 

Steve blinked at him, looking taken aback.

“Dr. Banner, I have already spoken to Mr. Stark and he assures me that they can have a birthday cake brought in by later tonight, but Agent Romanov is insisting on actually baking a cake by hand, but that would require going to the store,” Jarvis spoke, startling both of them. Steve glanced sideways at Bruce, who quirked a smile.

“I think perhaps it would be best if we go and join them, before it turns into utter chaos.” He said, though his tone was calm his eyes were sparkling a tiny light green with mischief. Sometimes, Steve wondered if Bruce knew that his eyes changed from brown to green from time to time. 

“Sir, Mr. Stark is insisting on buying the good Captain as much alcohol as possible, so that they can celebrate his birthday with style,” Jarvis informed them. 

“Avengers Assemble?” Bruce guessed, as Steve moved quickly towards the kitchen. 

“Avengers Assemble,” Steve agreed, and both of them left the gym, the punching bag still moving, though quietly, back and forth, behind them.

==

End


End file.
